How I Overcame A Phobia

Hello Readers and new followers

Continuing on from my blog on 7th May 2015 – (Broken Oath Book Review - chapter five) Recollecting A Forgotten Desire; where I shared with you my own experience of remembering a forgotten issue; fear of deep water - those of you who are curious to know how I cured myself from this phobia - take a seat and relax as you read my story – everything happened in real time:-

It was 30th November 2003, a period before I started accepting and believing in my intuition. At the time, I was embarking on a home study personal development course; Spiritual Psychology. I was studying a module about 'clearing' - getting rid of old stuff - negative emotions that no longer served me. In the text, I came across the term 'free association of ideas.' I was intrigued, as I had never heard of this terminology before; having a blank page/paper, asking a question and writing down whatever pops into my head. So, I thought OK, let me give it a go and so I asked the question. ‘Why am I so afraid of deep water?' I can't recall how long I sat there with my blank sheet of paper and my pen, but nothing happened. No information came to mind. Anyway, I forgot about it and went to bed. That night, I dreamt:-

I was walking along a busy road somewhere in the pouring with rain. I saw a woman and a child who were about to cross a busy dual carriageway. I looked to my left and saw some children in a shop entrance and my mind’s eye told me that they were related to the woman and the child.

The child was a girl around 3 or 4 years old, she wore a yellow dress or skirt which touched the ground and a three quarter length red coat. She also had an red umbrella to match. I noticed the woman was holding her hand tightly and that the child was in distress.

I ignored the scene and carried on walking when suddenly I heard the woman calling after the child. I looked back and saw that the girl was chasing her umbrella which had blown out of her hand by the wind. The umbrella had blown onto the dual carriageway - I saw the child run into the road after it and I was surprised that the woman did not go after her. Horrified, I chased after the girl. I ran into the road, but by this time, she had reached the other side of the carriageway still chasing her umbrella.

I tried to catch up with her but the harder I tried, the further she seemed to be away from me and the rain began to lash down hard on my face. I looked up and I could see the top of the dual carriageway; the cars were just beginning to come down the four lanes.

The child was on the opposite pavement still running here and there trying to catch her umbrella and each time the wind blew it further away from her. It blew the umbrella towards the road again. By this time, the road and pavement were beginning to flood with water and I was still some distance away from her, trying desperately to catch up with her.

I saw the girl run towards the road, totally oblivious to the danger she was in from the cars which by now were coming down the hill. As she ran closer to the edge of the pavement, it suddenly became awash with water and she fell over into it.  I was terribly anxious, my heart was pounding. I reached the part of the pavement where I saw her fall but I could not see her body on the ground. I looked behind me, I saw the waves of the flooded water roll back and forth over the pavement, then, suddenly I saw what looked like a pot hole at the side of the pavement in the road, it was then that I realised the child had fallen down into the dark hole. I screamed and ran over -  a young man also ran across to see what my distress was about.  At that point, I was on my knees with my hand in the hole, thrashing it to and fro. I could feel the mud and the slime; in my mind's eye I could see the blackness and could sense a demonic 'pull' or 'force.' I became afraid and I quickly withdrew my hand.

As I pulled out my arm, I screamed to the young man for help, then something made me look across to the other side of the road - there sitting on the ground were six men, none of whom would come to my aid. They just stared. I looked up and another man came over to join the young man already standing beside me. He was older and he a shovel in his hand. I asked him to help me to rescue the child but he just stood there staring at me and said nothing. Then without emotion he spoke. "There is nothing you can do, you cannot save her, she's gone, she's dead."

At that point I cried and I screamed. I wanted to save her, I so desperately wanted to save her. She was just there in the hole. In my mind's eye, I could see her body curled up, wedged in the dark pit. 'How could we just leave her there?’ I thought. (While all this was happening, the woman who was with the child did nothing, she just stood there on the opposite side of the road motionless.)

I got to my feet and stood there staring at the pot hole, I was crying and screaming at the men....then....without warning....my dream ended.

I woke up from the dream, my eyes streaming with tears, my heart pounding, I was so emotionally charged. I rose from my bed and went to the kitchen to get a drink; I thought that was the end of my dream but no so - it seemed the porthole of my dream world was still open – in my mind’s eye, I saw the young girl, though she was dead, she threw me a ball, I saw the ball coming and while I was still making my drink, I instinctively I raised my right hand and caught this invisible ball. As I did so, two things happened – the child whispered her name to me, it was the most beautiful name I have ever heard, secondly, I began to feel a tingling sensation run down my body; from my arm which held the ghostly ball, down to my feet. As this energy passed through me, I felt a ‘healing’ and I felt a ‘deep love.’

From that moment on, my fear of deep water vanished. After that regression, I was able to wash the dishes in the sink filled fully with water, I was able to bathe in the bath full with water and have a real soak. And when I had my next holiday which was in Dubai, December 2004, for the first time in my live, I enjoyed walking along the beach and allowing the waves of the sea to kiss my feet. It did not bother me to wade out in the water to gather seashells, it was wonderful.  I now dream of swimming with dolphins.

I discussed this dream with a relative, and I asked;-

If this was a past life experience of drowning, why was there a dual carriageway?

She said, my mind put together a scene that I was able to cope with and understand. Ok, I get that.

Why did I only notice the colour of clothes the child was wearing?

She stated: The child was specifically dressed in yellow and red because they were ‘sacrificial colours.’ And she was meant to die. Hm interesting.

Ok, why was I not able to save the girl.?

Answer – because I was only meant to see what happened, I was not meant to save her.

Very interesting! I never forgot the dream and I never forgot the child’s name.

If you have any views on this, let me know.

Hope you enjoyed this article. It was an emotional experience for me, but it cured my phobia.

Best Regards
D. A. Martin

Writer and Bestseller Author of Broken Oath

Awarded An Honorary Mention

by the London Book Festival Award (2014)

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Broken-Oath-D-A-Martin/dp/1291517537/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1385064589&sr=8-1&keywords=Broken+oath

http://www.doramartin.tel

http://www.doratheauthor.blogspot.co.uk

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Dora-The-Author-Books/657344564284562

http://youtu.be/5hN3aLIpFFA

http://www.bloglovin.com/blog/10613721/broken-oath

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Recollecting A Forgotten Desire

BROKEN OATH BOOK REVIEW - CHAPTER FIVE

I am excited about this chapter, I find it absolutely fascinating in this part of the book; after many Eons, Karob - the Lord of Karma, suddenly has a flash memory and recalls his soul's purpose; the pursuit of Melee; the Lady of Time and is surprised as to how he could have forgotten this issue. Actually he is fortunate as most of people drift through life with no idea why they are here or what they are really meant to be doing.

Many of us have a lot of unexplained and unresolved issues in our lives and no knowledge of how they got there or how to deal with them. Most of us would never consider the concept of reincarnation and that we bring our 'stuff' with us whether good or bad, into our next existence. We just see our situation as somebody else's fault or that is just the way life is.

Our subconscious mind is always trying to 'wake us up' to get us to remember; you know, that weird feeling you sometimes get - a feeling of something you are trying to remember but it always slip your mind. Or maybe you experience déjà vu.

Karob kept trying to remember, then without notice, it all came flooding back; emotions and all.  Amongst his feelings he must have felt angry, perhaps at himself for being hoodwinked. And I can imagine his frustration because now he was in a situation where his hands were tied and he is bound to a commitment at the behest of a higher force. I wonder how many of us have 'awaken' only to find our powers have been contricted by circumstances, environment, people around us or maybe even a continent.

In reality, the mass of humankind are unable to complete the journey of their soul's purpose, even when they have awaken; I can imagine that many, maybe, through embarrassment, thrust themselves into a state of frustration which manifests through illness, dis-ease of all kind and even phobias without ever knowing why.

I remember when I was child around 7 or 8 years of age, I was reading a book. Many of you may know this book; Cat In The Hat by Dr Seuss. As I read the book, I began reading a page where the cat was taking a bath, he pulled the plug and as the water began to be swallowed up in the plughole, the vacuum was so strong that it sucked the Cat In The Hat in as well. As I read, my emotions turns to shock horror and at that moment, I had a flash memory; it was something I forgot to remember, something terrible. What was it?............

I was afraid of water; something happened a long time ago, I didn't know what it was, I only knew it was bad and I had to stay away from deep water. This memory that came from nowhere had gripped me so strongly that after the recollection, for the rest of my life growing up, I steered clear away from anything that resembled deep water; I would only take shallow bath, I would never wash dishes with the sink 'full' of water. I can recall even being afraid as I put my hand in the sink to pull the plug.  I was apprehensive as I felt the suction of the water being lured into the plughole.  I did not go swimming at school, though I had to sit by in the swimming pool area and watch the other kids enjoy themselves, little did they know how terrified I was just being in that environment.

This phobia continued well into my adult life and into my 40's. What was it that I remembered?........ I drowned. I just couldn't remember where or when, but the fear of water and drowning was real.

Do you want to know how I found out what happened to me? How, where and why I drowned?.........Well, that's another story.

But can you now imagine how Karob soon became obsessed with finding Melee. He had to go back to the exact same location where he last saw her in order to pick up her spiritual trail. His frustration will continue as he now tries hard to get back on track and continue with his soul’s purpose.

Like Karob; all our ills are merely forgotten or unfinished business and issues, the soul never forgets; only when we deal with them and complete them, will they cease to plague our lives.

You can find out how I solved the mystery of my phobia in my next blog.

Best Regards

D. A. Martin

Bestseller Author of Broken Oath

Awarded An Honorary Mention

by the London Book Festival Award (2014)

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Broken-Oath-D-A-Martin/dp/1291517537/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1385064589&sr=8-1&keywords=Broken+oath

http://www.doramartin.tel

http://www.doratheauthor.blogspot.co.uk

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Dora-The-Author-Books/657344564284562

http://youtu.be/5hN3aLIpFFA

http://www.bloglovin.com/blog/10613721/broken-oath

http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=D._A._Martin